A marriage with finesse

Happy bride & groom – June 16,1979

Tomorrow marks 33years of marriage to my very best friend.  Since I’ve been featuring some of my friends each Friday, I thought this week would be a perfect time for you to meet the husband and get his take on our marriage.

Q: What’s the best thing about our marriage?

Special date – May 1978

A: Our deep friendship.  Since our first date we’ve been friends.  For over 34 years we’ve been able to sit and talk.  Sometimes one of us can say a word or a short phrase from a movie or sitcom and we both start laughing.  Only the two of us get the joke.  I love your laugh.  It always makes me either smile or begin laughing, too.

Dinner cruise – April 2010

Q: What’s the biggest misconception about our marriage?

A: That it’s always been “perfect” from an outsider’s perspective.  Those who’ve known us in the last half of our marriage aren’t aware of the bumps and collisions that have brought us to this very respectful and loving relationship. On the other hand, those who haven’t spent much time with us in the last half of our marriage are probably amazed we’ve hung in there this long.

Grand Canyon – March 2012

Q: What are your top three tips for a long and happy marriage?

1) Think of your spouse before yourself in every decision.  After all, every decision will ultimately affect your spouse.
 2) Listen.  We hear, but rarely listen as we should.  A lot of people appear to listen, but they’re really just planning their response.
3) It’s the small things and the unexpected gestures.  Be grateful for a smile, a kiss, a flirting wink.  Life is short and we never know when these little actions won’t always be available.  I appreciate each kiss before I walk out the door, the wave as I leave and the smile that greets me when I return.

Exploring the Oregon Caves – June 2011

 Awe – thanks, Sweetie! You’re the best and I’m looking forward to many more great years together!!


My marriage finesse level: 

Novice     Advanced beginner     Competent        Proficient        Expert      

What’s your marriage finesse level?

*finesse (skill, flair, grace elegance, poise, assurance)